Chapter 2: Troll Patrol

Disclaimer

The Norwegian government has for decades been working to keep the trolls a secret, and denying their existence. Their motives are unclear, and all efforts to document their workings have failed – except the documentary Trollhunter. Be advised, that talking about trolls can bring you into their spotlight.

As I was enjoying my morning coffee looking out the window, I saw the seagulls breaking off into flight. It was a sign that rain was coming.  In the horizon, the clouds were thickening.

It had been some time since my last patrol, and the tell-tale signs were in the air – trolls might be gathering. As all Norwegian men had learnt in the Viking days, the trolls had to be kept in balance. Sadly, this was a legacy few remembered. The trolls have gone by many names, but were usually known as the Jötunn in the Old Norse mythology. It is a known fact that they are sensitive to sunlight, and will turn into stone in direct sun exposure. But, they can move freely in the fog!

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To have a fighting chance against even small trolls, you need both a body that can take and dish out punishment.  The Farmers Walk exercise is an excellent strategy for building toughness.  So, I attached my monkii bars to large stones to complete heavy walks, before going deep into the woods for patrolling.

As my journey took me deeper into the forest, the clouds were gathering and the rain started to pour down.  I kept moving recalling an old northern Norwegians proverb: “There is no bad weather, only poor choice of clothes.”

Today’s chosen workout was the Camping #10 “Camp-chipper”. A workout that could turn boys into men.

I made my first stop to setup my monkii bars on a tree facing the lake and started to do my pullups and toes-to-bars. It was grueling work, but this is what it takes to stand any chance against the trolls. When I finished, I had to move on. There were no trolls, but that meant my only choice was to go deeper into the darkening woods.

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I came to the next lake where I continued my workout – after scanning the area for lurking trolls that is.

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There were still no trolls, so I moved on. As I swiftly made my way, I passed the old shed. It had been hit by a large object, and my bet was on the troll. I stopped for the last part of the chipper, keeping my eyes open. There were no trolls lurking this day, and my duties where paid. I felt relief, as I turned and ran home, knowing that Lofoten was safe this night.

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Workout: Camping # 10

Complete in order: 

30 Pullups
30 Toes-to-Bars
30 Dips
30 Rows
30 Pushups
30 Flys

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